People die, my friends. Things change. Good things end. Bad things end (more slowly, it seems). Change and transformation from one state into another is the way of things in this particular shared reality we’re all in. There’s no getting around it or away from it, and while it’s good to let people know how you feel about them while they’re alive, it’s also good to let people know how you feel about them after they’re dead. They don’t just poof off into nothing once they die. They become <insert belief system here>, but they are still your people. So talk to them. They are changed, but they still are yours. Be honest and fair about your feelings, and speak the truth. Don’t lie, to yourself or to other people. Those lies you tell will come back to bite you in the ass, and they’ve usually gotten bigger and grown teeth in the interim, so just don’t. And when sudden tragedy strikes, and it does because #life , do the best you can about it, be honest, help who you can where and when you can, and mourn your dead with love and great respect for this crazy journey we’re all on together.